The first in what is sure to be an irregular series of items documenting the things which have pleased and displeased me in recent times...
UPPERS
- Those giant four pack of cookies you get in Tesco. If you've tasted them you'll know the ones I'm on about.
- The Undateables - guilty pleasure? Why don't I feel guilty then.
- Rafael da Silva, the embodiment of what it means to play for Manchester United.
- The bantz between Alexander Armstrong and Richard Osman on Pointless.
- Borgen, arguably even better than its compatriot The Killing.
- Bed time flatulence. My own not anyone else's.
- Behaving like someone half your age while feeling like someone twice your age.
- Discovering bands from bygone eras and having an entire back catalogue to enjoy.
- Conscientious customer service, as surprising as it is delightful.
- Youtube videos of dogs being dogs.
- Kelley Kapoor from the US Office, both for her acting abilities and her dusky good looks.
- The look on a loved one's face when receiving an unexpected gift.
- The word 'impromptu'. It sounds like it should be a naughty sex act – I got caught having an impromptu with yer wan down an alley.
- RTÉ News Now, about time we got a dedicated news channel.
- Doing your level to best to ignore all talk of economic crises, resulting in a much happier existence.
DOWNERS
- Russell Howard, the worst 'comedian' currently on TV. And that's quite an achievement in this day and age.
- The vague, unseen boundary between the women's department and the men's department in certain clothing stores.
- Trying on a 'ladies hat' in one of the aforementioned stores.
- Those inane Facebook posts which tell you to “repost this if you've got a sister/brother/mother/father/auntie/uncle/cousin/gran/grandad that you love with all your heart”. I'll just tell them myself thanks.
- La liga, like the SPL just with better weather.
- That moment when your brolly goes inside out during a particularly windy storm.
- The hellish, ice-cold terror that is the five minutes between exiting the shower, getting dry and then getting dressed.
- That Corrs Light ad, seriously how long has that been on for now?
- Daniel Day Lewis and his “towering performances”. Getting a little boring now.
- iTunes, do you need a Phd in the sciences to fully understand how it works?
- Those little balls of fluff which form on your living room floor if you don't hoover for a while.
- Getting chastised by beggars for not crossing their palms with silver.
- Self-service checkout ditherers, if you don't know how it works just use the normal tills.
- Painstakingly hanging an enormous load of washing on the clothes horse and then watching it collapse under the strain.
- Internet-exclusive terms like 'trolling', 'flaming' and 'griefing'.
- Civilians openly urinating in public, DURING THE DAY. What the fuck is wrong with these people?