A SPRINT NOT A MARATHON
What's your first port of call when
a big news story breaks? Depending on my circumstance I will always
turn to BBC News or, if unable to access a television, Twitter. So on
Monday evening when the first reports of an explosion at the Boston
marathon surfaced I dutifully switched to the Beeb while
simultaneously scouring my Twitter feed for updates. I lasted about
20 minutes before I had to switch both off. First to go was the TV, a
steady stream of meaningless interviews containing nothing more than
speculation and conjecture saw to that. But that was okay, I've come
to expect tedium from 24 hour news channels. In the case of Twitter
however I found myself logging out before I lost all faith in the
human race.
The clamour to be first with the
macabre details was unrelenting. “Follow all the action here”,
“LIVE UPDATES FROM BOSTON BOMBING”, “Two dead, up to 100
injured, more to follow....”. And so it went on. A tragic
occurrence reduced to nothing more than a sideshow as the world's
populous vied for the most salacious headlines. Of course there were
the odd conscientious voice lamenting the loss of two people but they
were quickly drowned out by the braying mob. I, like everyone else,
was eager to find out exactly what had happened in Massachusetts but
not in this fashion. I didn't need slow motion replays of the moment
of impact, nor did I need pictures of clearly distressed runners
covered in blood, and I certainly didn't need a who's who of news
stations engaging in their own civil war before my eyes.
Unfortunately there is an audience
for this kind of reporting. Never once during 9/11 did I stop to
consider how horrific it must have been to die in a towering inferno
or to be left with no choice but to plummet to your death from thirty
storeys high. I was too busy firing texts back and forth, glued to
Sky News as I willed the attackers to hit the Pentagon and keep the
entertainment going. We can't help ourselves, it may be happening in
real life but because it's on TV and is happening far away we care
not for the welfare of those involved. Indeed as I went for a walk to
clear my head of all things Boston and bombing I sensed an air of
disappointment in my own corner of the world. As I walked past a man
engaged in a panicked phone call with a loved one I overhead him say,
“Quick turn on Sky News, there's been a bombing at the Boston
Marathon. Two dead and 22 injured.......but there could be more”.
AND
THEN I SAW HER FACE
Surprised isn't quite the word. No,
no appalled doesn't quite fit the bill either. If I was to sum it up
in one succinct phrase I think I'd plump for 'dejected bemusement'.
The source of my confused sadness? He of the Beliebers. Justin.
Writing in the guest book of the Anne Frank museum that she was a
“great girl” and he hoped that were she alive today “she would
have been a belieber” is not in itself all that surprising. He is
after all a teen icon, a child cosseted by minders and money, someone
completely out of touch with reality. I wouldn't expect much more
from him to be honest. What reference point could he possibly have as
he attempted to reconcile his own life with the experiences of the
tragic Anne Frank? None whatsoever.
But even the most simple-minded of
modern-day heroes must surely be able to heed the advice of those who
have thus far steered his career into the stratosphere. Did someone
explain to young Justin just how important a figure Anne Frank is
when it comes to our recent history? Did they warn about making glib
statements which might reflect badly upon him? “Hey Justin, this
Anne Frank girl went through a helluva time, be cool alright man”,
“Yeah dude, I'm on it”. Or maybe his entourage are just as dumb
as he? Maybe the people who control this pop puppet thought it was
okay to desecrate Anne's name with this simpleton's musing? That's
what really concerns me.
RIGHT
TO SPEAK
Picture the scene; you're at home on
a Saturday evening and it's approaching dinner time, “What shall we
have for our dinner”, you ask the assembled throng, “Mmm I'd
quite like some Indian”, says little Ricky, his eyes lighting up.
Immediately the poor child's request is drowned out by a chorus of
boos, “Ooooohhhh, ohhhh, aahhhh, nnooooo, bbooooo”. He tries to
respond with an argument furthering his case but is again overwhelmed
by the protests of his determined siblings. “Fine we won't have
Indian then”, says Ricky as he sullenly scans the pizza menu. Not
really the best way to settle an argument is it? And yet it is the
method favoured by those charged with running our country.
I rarely watch the Daíl's daily
dealings, but on the odd occasion that I do I'm invariably treated to
a group of grown men behaving like primates. I'm vaguely aware of
this slanging and slagging having historical resonance but this is
the 21st century can it not be replaced with something
more urbane? Buzzers perhaps? Or maybe not, can you imagine the
mayhem if they all had little buttons to press? Red-faced and
sweating they'd all hammer their buttons into submission before
bitterly complaining that “mine wasn't working”. How about they
signal their intent to speak by raising their arm in the air and
frantically chanting “Miss, Miss, Miss” just like we did in
school? Although the last thing anyone wants to see are the flabby
underarms of our government. Or they could just try something
completely radical and wait their turn, that sounds a bit far-fetched
though in fairness.
MEDICAL
MISADVENTURE
I still can't be quite certain what
this means can you? Misadventure? Thesaurus.com defines it as “bad
luck, mishap”. So essentially what they're saying is that Savita's death was a terrible mix-up, an awful mess, we're really sorry about
that. What a cop out. Even worse is the list of recommendations which
were set out to avoid further similar 'misadventures'.
1 The
Medical Council should lay out exactly when a doctor can intervene to
save the life of the mother in similar circumstances.
Erm is there no such thing as common
sense these days? Why must a doctor adhere to protocol when there's
lives on the line?
2
Blood samples
should be properly followed up and proper procedures put in place to
ensure errors don't occur.
What
the fuck is this, a Carry On movie?
3
Protocols
should be followed in the management of sepsis and there should be
proper training and guidelines for all medical and nursing personnel.
Ah
yes proper training for our doctors and nurses, why didn't we think
of this before?! Doh!
4
Proper and
effective communication to occur between staff on-call and a team
coming on duty and a dedicated handover time to be set aside for such
communications.
What?
We have to talk to each other? And tell one another what's wrong with
the patients? Ah come on now this is getting excessive!
The
rest of the recommendations follow a similar suit as doctors are told
to always tie their laces before coming on duty and nurses are
advised to go wee-wee at least once every four hours.
It's rather crass of me to joke about such a sensitive case but it's got to the point where I don't know whether to laugh or cry. The least the Halappanavars deserve is justice, the very least. Instead they have been fobbed off with rhetoric and spin, told “we're very sorry now toddle off and stop being such a nuisance”. Praveen plans to take this to the European Courts, and who can blame him? His wife has been unnecessarily taken from him and those responsible for her death are hiding behind the state in a desperate attempt to maintain their careers. I hope he takes down not only those directly at fault but each and every person who so guilelessly tried to cover up this sorry affair into the bargain.
CAN
YOU TELL WHO IT IS YET?
I
often bemoan the lack of freedom given to kids today, let them run
free I say, didn't do us any harm. But it's a different world now, a
world full of child-killers and paedophiles, you'd be crazy to let
them out of your sight for even a second. It's often made me wonder
about my own childhood, I mean where were all the nonces then? I was
fortunate enough never to be an altar boy but was it just the
Catholic church that spawned these odious creatures? No, the BBC was
in on it too. The unmasking of Jimmy Savile was hardly that
surprising, he was always an oddball. The same goes for Jim Davidson,
Stuart Hall and Freddie Starr, it didn't take a huge leap of the
imagination to envisage that motley crue getting up to no good. But
Rolf?
He
released a song entitled “Two little boys” and still no-one
batted an eyelid. And why would they? The cuddly Antipodean looked
about as harmless as they come. “Can you tell what it is yet?”
he'd ask as his latest creation came to fruition, and we would
innocently guess 'Kangaroo' or 'Koala' when in actual fact it was
his penis, rising in his pants. Oh Rolf, say it ain't so. But it is
so. Just in the same way prospective paedos joined the priesthood in
the hope of gaining access to vulnerable children their broadcasting
counterparts did likewise via the BBC. They may indeed have been
simpler times but thanks to these monsters we'll never look back on
them with the same fondness again.
MUSIC
SOUNDS BETTER WITH YOU
Daft
Punk are quite rightly regarded as one of contemporary music's most
important acts. Their 1996 début Homework deserves to be ranked
among the very best of any pieces of music, never mind the electronic
dance genre. The follow-up Discovery was a similar tour-de-force and
cemented their status as arguably the most influential band of my
lifetime. Human After All was a slight let-down by their own very
high standards but it did nothing to sully their renown. They are
legends in their field and if anything their slight back catalogue
only enhances their standing. So when it was announced that a new
album was forthcoming in 2013 the world, quite rightly, turned on
it's axis. Early samples were devoured by eager fans and the hype
surrounding the first single was unparalleled. And then it came out,
and Pharell Williams was on it, and it sounded a bit meh, but the
public lapped it up. What's gone on here then?
Firstly the presence of the Neptunes producer goes against everything that has come before. Daft Punk have never needed superstar guest appearances in the past so why start now? What else can we expect once the album comes out? Justin Timberlake? Will.I.Am? Who's next up to desecrate their once pristine reputation? You may think this an overreaction but to me Daft Punk are one of the few remaining bands that can be relied upon to try something new, to eschew the path taken by others and release something brave, something daring. I'm loathe to use the phrase sell-out but that's what it looks like to me. Get Lucky is everywhere at the moment, all over the Internet, all over the airwaves. Daft Punk were never about that. Naturally I will hold fire until I hear the final product, after all there was a similar reaction when One More Time came out - and Discovery didn't turn out too bad eh?
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